Pray by Lauren Spencer Smith

I feel like I’m behind on everything, and that’s because I am behind. I’m unsure why, but having a sinus issue is causing me brain fog, so I ended up scrolling YouTube all weekend, and I haven’t finished a book since Friday, so I’m upset with myself, but you can’t cry tears over unread pages. On the bright side, I listened to music, including some songs from the release radar playlist Spotify does every Friday.

When I enjoy a song, it is most likely because it evokes an emotion in me that I can relate to, especially the lyrics, which can have meanings based on the person’s life experiences. This happened with Pray by Lauren Spencer Smith; the first lines speak a whole language to me: “I couldn’t guess all the things going on in your head.” Many of us want the relationship to work so badly that we try to understand the other person when they, themselves, aren’t able to know what they are feeling. It often leads to not seeing what we feel is valid. It’s a toxic cycle that sometimes takes years to get out of.

Pray Lyrics:

I couldn’t guess all the things going on in your head

All the reasons you had when you left

I don’t need to know

After a while, all the memories that I had left

Were the ones I don’t want to forget

Now I keep them close

So when you think of me, in the dead of night

Baby don’t you cry

Darling I pray for ya

Yeah I pray for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

Always have grace for ya

I’ll take the pain for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

There was a time

Where the words that you said really cut

Where I couldn’t help holding a grudge

But I let it go

So I want you to find your peace

It’s okay if it’s not me

Don’t need your apology for giving me hope

 Darling I pray for ya

Yeah I pray for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

Always have grace for ya

I’ll take the pain for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

 Yeah I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Said I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Said I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Said I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

When you think of me

And you want to cry

Cause the things you did

Keep you up at night

When you think of me

Baby don’t think twice

It’s all alright

Darling I pray for ya

Yeah I pray for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

I’ll always have grace for ya

I’ll take the pain for ya

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

Yeah I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Said I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Said I’ll pray

(Pray, pray, pray, pray)

Wherever you go, I want you to know

That I pray

Love To Heal

With every relationship, there are pieces

We gain and lose

The smiles and good mornings

The need to hold hands

But when people are there to see

And my hand is out

For yours to get

You are nowhere

To be found

Teaching me that

I’m only suitable for love

Behind close doors

Doors that wanted to

Be opened, but when they do

It’s just me standing there

By myself.

Gosh, that’s the most I felt writing in a long time, and it feels incredible. If anything, I hope you reading this; if you made it this far, you will be inspired not to change for anyone, no matter what.

Alex