Post Seeing My New Endocrinologist Thoughts

I wasn’t going to post this; in fact, it took me about a month to get the courage to post this. I’m not doing it for pity or for people to feel sorry for me. I’m doing this because it might help someone else and for me to read as time passes.

I must say that going into it; I felt like I was about to be served a prison sentence or being set free. I went into the room, and the nurse asked me who was waiting with me, and I said, mum and sister. The endocrinologist said good morning and started asking questions. I told him about my PCOS, and he opened my old hormones test and what he saw didn’t match with PCOS, and that was a bit of a shock for me. It’s what we were told I had when I was 15 before I was discharged by the gynaecologist I had.


Another issue is my antidepressants (fluvoxamine), which again I was given by a psychiatrist and was discharged by that doctor too. However, he didn’t tell my parents when I can stop taking them being that I was 15; therefore, still underage I had no say in it. Eight years later, I’m still taking them. As I’m learning more about myself, I’m noticing that I feel anxious every time I get dysphoria like they’re best friends or something I won’t have one without the other, which might be the problem here. But again, I’m not a psychiatrist.

When my mum enters the room, she acted very supportively, and that’s not the mum I have to face at home, as you know, my mum is sometimes transphobia. She made the endocrinologist believe that I’m the one who takes my mum out of my life. As you know, I tried so much to tell how I’m feeling, but she is a wall I can’t breakthrough. And her pointing fingers at me hurt, and that’s when I ended up in tears. Luckily as time passes, the relationship with my mum is getting better.



The Definition of Normal /The Definition of Equal: The transgender story continues by E.S. Carpenter

I finished the first book in this dilogy back in 2017, and it was the first that I read that had a transgender main character. It was clear that Stephie was having a hard time dealing with the emotions that she is a girl inside. At the start of any transition, it brings a lot of self-blame and fear of the unknown, and I could read and feel how close to real life that aspect in the book is. I remember how strong friendships were. It taught me a life lesson that most parents accept their kids as who they are, even if that takes time. The love story between Jake and Stephie is to die for, adding to it was the lovemaking. I gave The Definition of Normal: A Transgender Love Story a five out of five stars.

I recurrently read The Definition of Equal: The transgender story continues (The Definition Duology Book 2) and I have mix feelings about it. We continue to see the love Stephie and Jake have for each other, while they take it to the next step. We meet with a new character called Colleen. Reading Colleen character was a reminder transphobia still exists even from those we love the most, our parents and in that case our friends become our family. I didn’t like some logics of things and the influence of society and how we don’t dare to step out of that box. Therefore, I gave this book three out of five stars.

The Definition of Normal: ...A Transgender Love Story The Definition of Equal: The transgender story continues... (The Definition Duology Book 2)


Pup Love

We all know how much joy your pups give us. For those of you who don’t know, I have something called Cerebral Palsy. One day I was in bed with my dog Yoka, and suddenly, this spasm pain hit me, and it was so painful that I couldn’t yell for mum. Luckily my dog noticed that something is wrong, and she went to mum started barking and wouldn’t let go; my mum came into the bedroom, and she found me nearly unconscious.

When the EMTs arrived, they found that my blood pressure was 50/30, which is dangerously low. So, my dog saved my life that day. That’s the reason why when I read this article; it touched me so much that I had to restart writing about this story about five times. Emma Mertens is a seven-year-old girl who is battling, cancer called DIPG or Diffuse Intrinsic Pontine Glioma. This type of tumor typically affects kids between five to seven of age and a cure is yet to be found.

Emma from Wisconsin had one wish, that is to receive letters from dogs. Every time she sees a picture of a dog, her face lights up. It all started when her family and friends decided to hop in on this project of sending Emma letters and photos penned by their doggies as a form of pick me.

However, the world soon got wind of this project, after someone posted about it on Facebook and shortly after that a celebrity from the show The Real Housewives of New Jersey shared it on her Instagram, and from there it went viral. Now Emma gets around 3,000 messages every hour and from different corners of the world. A neighbor set up a GoFundMe to cover for Emma’s medical bills since her mother had to stop working to care of Emma.

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CNN News

Emma’s GoFundMe



Firsts Lines Fridays

First Lines Fridays is a weekly feature for book lovers hosted by Wandering Words. What if instead of judging a book by its cover, its author or its prestige, we judged it by its opening lines?

  • Pick a book off your shelf (it could be your current read or on your TBR) and open to the first page
  • Copy the first few lines, but don’t give anything else about the book away just yet – you need to hook the reader first
  • Finally… reveal the book


EIGHT DAYS AGO my life was an up and down affair. Some of it good. Some of it not so good. Most of it uneventful. Long slow periods of nothing much, with occasional bursts of something. Like the army itself. Which is how they found me. You can leave the army, but the army doesn’t leave you. Not always. Not completely.

They started looking two days after some guy took a shot at the president of France. I saw it in the paper. A long-range attempt with a rifle. In Paris. Nothing to do with me. I was six thousand miles away, in California, with a girl I met on a bus. She wanted to be an actor. I didn’t. So after forty-eight hours in LA she went one way and I went the other. Back on the bus, first to San Francisco for a couple of days, and then to Portland, Oregon, for three more, and then onward to Seattle. Which took me close to Fort Lewis, where two women in uniform got out of the bus. They left an Army Times behind, one day old, right there on the seat across the aisle.

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And The Book Is..

Personal (Jack Reacher, #19)
(Jack Reacher #19)
by Lee Child


Goodreads Blurb

You can leave the army, but the army doesn’t leave you. Not always. Not completely, notes Jack Reacher—and sure enough, the retired military cop is soon pulled back into service. This time, for the State Department and the CIA.

Someone has taken a shot at the president of France in the City of Light. The bullet was American. The distance between the gunman and the target was exceptional. How many snipers can shoot from three-quarters of a mile with total confidence? Very few, but John Kott—an American marksman gone bad—is one of them. And after fifteen years in prison, he’s out, unaccounted for, and likely drawing a bead on a G8 summit packed with enough world leaders to tempt any assassin.

If anyone can stop Kott, it’s the man who beat him before: Reacher. And though he’d rather work alone, Reacher is teamed with Casey Nice, a rookie analyst who keeps her cool with Zoloft. But they’re facing a rough road, full of ruthless mobsters, Serbian thugs, close calls, double-crosses—and no backup if they’re caught. All the while Reacher can’t stop thinking about the woman he once failed to save. But he won’t let that happen again. Not this time. Not Nice.

Reacher never gets too close. But now a killer is making it personal.

Top Five Wednesday

Hosted by Sam @ Thoughts on Tomes and Lainey @ gingerreadslainey.

July 11th 2018: Future Classics
–What books do you think with stand the test of time?

A Very Large Expanse of Sea
A Very Large Expanse of Sea
by Tahereh Mafi
Ivy Aberdeen's Letter to the World
Ivy Aberdeen’s Letter to the World
by Ashley Herring Blake
Like a Love Story
Like a Love Story
by Abdi Nazemian
With the Fire on High
With the Fire on High
by Elizabeth Acevedo 
The Boy Who Harnessed the Wind: Creating Currents of Electricity and Hope
The Boy Who Harnessed the Wind: Creating Currents of Electricity and Hope
by William Kamkwamba, Bryan Mealer