I’m wondering if I need friends, and with how I’m feeling, I think the answer is yes. I need to explain this one. I had two close friends I would open up with whenever I needed. One of them met a girl who I think will be his future wife, so he decided to put his friends to the side or at least that’s how it feels. I haven’t seen him in person in more than a year. We used to meet or voice call at least once a month.
The last time I spoke to the other friend, they told me they no longer believe in friendships or friends. Which I won’t lie was a blow to me because I considered this person as my brother. The fact that here by myself with my mind having these thoughts doesn’t help the loneliness. Being lonely doesn’t mean I’m depressed in my case, and it means that I’m open to new friends or something. This is a big step because I can be a bit of a loner.
I did try to go on those sites where you can meet strangers but being that I’m trans and a wheelchair user, I tend to attract a few freaks or chasers that only want to see my body or sex—not saying that I’m not weird but people wanting me just for my body is a turn-off and makes me want to run. This post is more to help me process, but asking for new friends won’t hurt me either. Here are my socials where you can find me:
Discord @ alexjohaber#8466
And, of course, here and email
P.S. I needed to write this for me and you, in case you are like me; just know that it’s okay and you’re strong.