These are more like random thoughts after currently being told I have to be silent about some things, and I’m okay if you don’t want to read it; you don’t have to. I don’t share my life about being trans and disabled to pity because I know that doesn’t get you anywhere and won’t move forward if you put yourself into a state of self-pity. Yet, I went the opposite, and for years as a child, I thought I didn’t deserve things to be accessible to me.
In a way, I still feel guilty when things are made in a way to accommodate my disability, like a headset that allows me to do my job. Without knowing it, people put pressure on me by saying we need to change that so you can do this or that. My parents had to build a literal bathroom so I could use the toilet in primary school, most of which were out of their own pocket. I do get that it was the early 2000s, but still, it couldn’t get worse than that when it comes to accessibility or lack of it.
Ever since I started working at my current job, they made anything they could to give me access to do my job. From experience, I know this is rare hence the extra anxiety around the world of employment for people in the disability community. In the last year and a half, my managers have been trying to break me out of the guilt I feel when I have to reposition. Having Cerebral Palsy, just talking can make me spasm or/ and slide off the chair. What I mean here is that having accessibility doesn’t always imply rearranging stuff; it also means that you are flexible for that person’s needs.